Eating Disorders: A difficult addition to the Shabbat table

SOCIAL ISSUES AND SUSTAINABILITY,UK JEWRY

Deborah Blausten

" Deborah is an informal educator and community activist with an insatiable social media habit....."

23rd February, 2012

“If I tell you a secret, do you promise to tell the whole world?”  -Grace Bowman, Thin

1.6 Million.

That’s a lot of people. Nearly 5 times the number of Jews in the UK.

You’d be forgiven for thinking that if something affected that many people, that we’d know how to talk about it. In the case of Eating Disorders, you’d be mistaken.

A report released by Beat to mark Eating Disorders Awareness Week tells us that 58% of sufferers didn’t tell anyone about their Eating Disorder because they didn’t know how to talk about it. Nearly 2/3 waited more than 6 months before confiding in someone, and when they did, in 87% of cases it wasn’t a health professional that they contacted. Though substantive data is lacking, there is growing evidence to suggest that rates of Eating Disorders are higher in the Jewish community, and from much of the anecdotal evidence, so is the cult of silence (David Yehuda has addressed in more detail the problem of mental health stigma in our community, and you can find that blog here).

There is a deeply embedded relationship between Judaism and food, the daily ritual observance of Kashrut, the Seder plate, apples and honey on Rosh Hashannah, Shavuot cheesecake, Hamentaschen, matzo balls, your mother’s chicken soup; the smells and tastes of our Jewish year are integral to our cultural and religious identity. Given this centrality, its unsurprising that an Eating Disorder is a difficult addition to the Shabbat table, it presents questions about keeping Kashrut and casts a different light on the Yom Kippur fast. These are challenges that we don’t always have the answer to. Tight knit Jewish community can be beautiful; it can also be a place where gossip and stigma can flourish. Eating Disorders are messy, painful and complicated. Low self-esteem, social anxiety and shame, often coupled with sheer physical exhaustion make them isolating and remorseless in the way that they impact on people’s lives.

The theme of this year’s Eating Disorders Awareness Week is ‘Break the Silence’, and it’s an important message. For the 80% of people with an Eating Disorder who are overweight, for the majority who fall into the EDNOS category, and for those in recovery from all kinds, the narrow image of what an eating disorder is, or who suffers from it, presents a strong barrier to getting the help that they deserve. The term ‘Eating Disorder’ is culturally associated with images of emaciated teenage girls. It’s a striking image, it sells, but it’s a small part of a much more complex, but no less serious web of disorders ranging from Bulimia to Orthorexia and encompassing the wide spectrum of difficulties that fall under the EDNOS (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified) category.

Eating Disorders are not a fad or a lifestyle choice, they’re serious, but they CAN be beaten. Judaism can play an important part in people’s recovery, helping ascribe positive ritual significance to eating helps remove negative associations it may have once held. A spiritual community that reminds us that we are more than the sum of our experiences challenges the grip that an Eating Disorder can hold on someone’s identity.

Rabbis, lay leaders and members of the community can help by learning more. There are fantastic resources that include kavvanot for before meal times and sample programs for communities to run for teens and resources for camps and youth movements. There are organisations that exist to raise awareness of Eating Disorders in men and a new campaign run by young people called Hungry for Change is challenging stigma and broadening understanding. Students needing support or wanting to help support others can get involved with Student Run Self-Help.

This stuff isn’t easy to talk about, but for those who live with an Eating Disorder, the embarrassment tinged hush with which we characteristically address these issues can be excruciating. Like any other mental illness, Eating Disorders are nothing to be ashamed of.

I’m breaking the silence- will you join me?